Personal Ponderings

[from my online journal today]:

"I urge you to not take counsel of your fears. I hope you will not say, 'I'm not smart enough to study chemical engineering; hence, I'll study something less strenuous.' 'I can't apply myself sufficiently well to study this difficult subject or in this comprehensive field; hence, I'll choose the easier way.' I plead with you to choose the hard way and tax your talents. Our Heavenly Father will make you equal to your tasks. If one should stumble, if one should take a course and get less than the 'A' grade desired, I hope such a one will not let it become a discouraging thing to him. I hope that he will rise and try again."

Thomas S. Monson, "Decisions Determine Destiny," New Era, Nov. 1979, 8

I was often told growing up that I was "the smart one." Really, it's only because I have a good memory. I'm not saying I'm dumb, but I certainly don't think I have the intelligence others thought me to have. Perhaps it's because I think that common sense is tied in with intelligence, and I was told and have come to believe that I have very little of it. 

Still, I believe in potential. I believe that anyone can learn anything they so choose. They may not excel at it, but they can learn it and know somewhat of it. Example: Me and Math. I love math! Everything so logical. Can't do it even if my life depended on it. Oh well. That's why I'm friends with various math wizards and geniuses. When it comes my time for creating worlds, hopefully my husband has somewhat of an understanding of the maths and sciences so that we can create something feasible. Of course, I know that if it is us working together to create the best of our capabilities, then what we create will be magnificent.

Anywho. With my belief in potential, I also like to believe in what adults always told me: You can do anything. Well, all right. I believe most of that. I can't whistle. Can't. I've tried. I can't stand on my head. Good heavens--I can't even do a somersault anymore because of my fear that I'll break my neck. I have little athletic prowess. I'm not the greatest driver. And the list of what I can't do or what I'm not good at is endless. But I love the stories of Heber J. Grant. I believe in improvement. And development. And, well, reaching potential. Discovering what potential Heavenly Father has in mind for us and going for it.

This quote of President Monson's, and others similar to it, always gets me wondering. Again, when I was younger, I was told I could be anything. They opened the world to me. I wonder if I copped out. Did I take the easy route in profession? Did I shy away from the hard roads and take one that to me was just too easy? No challenge? 

I'm not whining, or bemoaning, or even berating myself. I'm just...pondering. Am I slacking on reaching my potential, or am I doing what Heavenly Father would have me do? I suppose I extend that to all aspects of my life instead of only my career. 

Do I do everything I can, should, and ought to do? Am I reaching potential or shirking the hard things of life?